Collection of Soviet, East German and Cold War jokes（4）

82.

Brezhnev called Nixon, saying that he had a dream last night: a red flag fluttered over the White House.

The next day Nixon told Brezhnev's dream: "Leonid, I dreamed of a red flag flying over the Kremlin!"

"But that's it now?"

"I don't necessarily ... the red flag in my dream seems to say Chinese ..."

83.

Question: Imagine Stalin, members of the Politburo, and all of their followers on a steam ship in the Neva River. Suddenly, the ship entered the water and sank quickly. Who would be saved?

Answer: All Soviet people.

84.

Q: Can I criticize Hitler?

Answer: Yes, just like you criticize Stalin's way. You lock yourself in the room, cover two layers, the best three layers of quilts, covering one on your face, preferably two pillows, and then you can speak freely. Remember, the time must be strictly limited within 5 minutes.

85.

Q: What is the unity of all ethnic groups under the Soviet system? Answer: It is all the Soviet nations such as Armenian, Russians, and Ukraine united, and they are united and fat.

86.

East Germans said to the West German: "We are a nation!"

The West German responded: "We are too."

87.

Doctors were inspected in a mental hospital.

"There is an extraordinary case here," the doctor pointed at a patient sighing. "He didn't turn off the radio when Angnec was scrapped!"

88.

In Democratic Germany prison, a prisoner explained to another for his imprisonment. "It's all because I'm too lazy."

"Slack?"

"No, I discussed political issues with a colleague. I thought he would have time to go to Starcia tomorrow morning. Whoever thinks he is one step than me."

89.

A democratic German resident was taken off the phone line. He ran to appeal and asked the reason. The relevant department told him: "Because you have slandered the Ministry of National Security."

"How do I slander?"

"We have records: You have claimed on the phone many times that the Ministry of Security has eavesdropped your call."

90.

Question: A satellite brand car stopped in front of the red light, the lights turned green, but the car did not move. What was going on?

Answer: There are gum on the ground. (East Germany's satellite car is famous for poor engine quality).

Soviet joke collection, this article continues to update.

91.

A man goes to see a mental doctor.

-Sevil me, doctor!

-What’s wrong with you?

-Is to anywhere, there are Zioscu, I turn on the TV, there is Ziosuki in it, I open the radio, and there is a jealous beans in front of me. I should open it in front of me. it?

(At a certain period, there must be a portrait of Ziosku in any room of the school agency)

92.

Q: How many people do I need to change the bulbs in Poland?

Answer: One hundred thousand hundreds, one person holds the bulb, and 100,000 people are responsible for turning the house.

93.

Sun Tzu complained to Grandpa: "Grandpa, you lie to me, I'm going to the Soviet Union, there is no gold and silver treasure beauty food at all.

"Who did you go with?" Grandpa asked.

"Travel in the country." Grandson replied.

"That's right, I went with Marshal Biscegish." Grandpa replied.

94.

Question: Can the Soviet bugs be revolutionary?

Answer: In principle, it is possible. After all, they are the blood of workers and farmers.

95.

Question: Is the Soviet Union maintained the record of the longest submarine voyage time?

answer. We have been on the bottom of the sea since 1957.

96.

Question: What are the things in common in the eighth grade students and satellite cars in pregnancy?

Answer: It is the shame of the whole family.

97.

Question: I heard that the Soviet army involved in the Czechoslovaka in response to the Czech government's request?

Answer: In principle, it is right. It just responded to the 1938 request.

98.

The trial of a member of the Interior People's Committee ended the trial work one day, returned to the office, and suddenly laughed alone. The colleagues at the opposite desk asked strangely: "Is there anything funny?"

"Yeah," the judge wiped the tears that smiled with a handkerchief: "A funny joke ..."

"Oh? Listen?"

"Are you crazy?! I just judged the guy who said this joke for five years!"

99.

In Houston, the investigation committee of the US Aerospace Agency discussed the reasons for the explosion of the spacecraft: "We checked it from beginning to end, but the reason why the left solid booster explosion cannot be found."

In Moscow, the investigation committee of the KGB Outer Corporation is also discussing the reason for the explosion of the aerospace aircraft: "We checked it from beginning to end, but we could not find the cause of the left solid booster explosion that was not pre - set. "

100.

Q: What is the prospect of reform?

Answer: There are two possible situations. The reality may be that the Mars will come to the earth to help us take care of everything. The science fiction may be that we can complete the reform goals ourselves.

101.

There are two types of people in the Soviet Union, black and red.

Black people are sitting with a black car and eating black caviar, and they can get all the gadgets that can only be seen in the black market for free.

The red people were carrying a red flag through the red flag on the red flag on the calendar.

102.

A Soviet worker was sent to the party's congress. He sat home at the table.

The wife asked, "Do you want soup?" He raised his left hand.

His wife asked, "Do you want potatoes and fried meat?" He raised his right hand again.

His wife asked, "Do you want vodka?" He stood up and raised his palm enthusiastically.

103.

There are a hundred security consultants in the US president, one of which is the KGB agent. Who is the investigation;

There are a hundred lover of Zambia President, one of which is AIDS, who is investigating;

There are a hundred economic advisers in the Soviet Union, one of which knows economics, who is investigating who is being investigated.

104.

The propagandist said in his speech: "Empires are interfered around the world in the world!"

105.

Someone pressed the doorbell. Robinoovic opened the door.

"Is Labinovic living here?"

"No, he doesn't live here."

One hour later, the doorbell rang again, and Labinovic opened the door.

"I told you that Labinoovic didn't live here."

"then who are you?"

"Labinovic."

"Then why do you say you are not here?!"

"You care about life?!"

106.

Russian immigrants opened a Russian restaurant in Hollywood called "Russia Nostalgic".

Menu: the first dish-Luo Song soup;

The second dish-fried buns;

Dessert-knocking on the customer's neck and roaring: "Roll out Jewish pigs!

Original link:
[Knowing the Xinghe Bubble: Soviet (Su Xiu), Eastern Europe and Cold War Joke Collection (4)] [2]